Are You Aligning Your Work to Your Life (or your life to your work)?

Four years ago, I sat at my kitchen table, staring at my pay stub that felt like a leash. It paid the bills, sure, but it tethered me to a life I didn’t love—one where work dictated my days, my energy, and even my dreams.

That’s when my husband and I made a choice: and I walked away. Since then, we’ve been downsizing and simplifying to rebuild work around the life we want. It hasn’t been easy, but it has been liberating. Today, I want to share how you—whether you’re a 9-5 employee or a solopreneur—can align your work to your life, not the other way around.

This isn’t about quitting your job or chasing some unattainable dream. It’s about making intentional choices to ensure your work serves your life’s purpose, not the other way around. Let’s dive into the problem, explore a solution, and walk through a simple framework to make it happen.

The Problem: When Work Owns You

Picture this: you’re grinding through another long day, answering emails at 9 p.m., or saying “yes” to a project that doesn’t excite you because it’s at least some departure from the routine rut you’re in. Maybe you’re an employee feeling trapped by the 9-5 hamster wheel, or a solopreneur taking every client gig to keep the lights on. Either way, you’re not in control—work is.

For employees, the struggle often comes from a system that rewards time over impact. You’re judged by hours logged, not the life you’re building outside the office. For solopreneurs, it’s the pressure to hustle 24/7, saying “yes” to every opportunity because you fear missing out on growth. The result? Burnout, resentment, and a life that feels like it’s slipping away.

I’ve been there. Before downsizing, I was juggling a job as a K-8 principal and side projects (yoga classes, workshops, etc.), trying to fast-track to retirement while maintaining a successful career. But my definition of success was one that society gave me—get a degree, get a job, work 40+ years, retire. 

Success isn’t measured by paychecks and exhaustion—it’s measured by how much your work fuels the life you want. The problem is, most of us are taught to fit our lives around our work, not the other way around.

The Solution: Design Work Around Your Life

What if work didn’t dictate your schedule, your energy, or your priorities? What if you could design your career to support the life you want to live? This isn’t a pipe dream; it’s a mindset shift backed by intentional action.

Research supports this approach. A 2024 Gallup study found that 70% of U.S. workers feel disengaged, often because their jobs don’t align with their personal values or goals. Meanwhile, a 2025 Zippia report noted that 61% of employees want to leave their jobs, citing lack of purpose as a top reason. For solopreneurs, the challenge is similar: a 2023 Upwork study showed that 44% of freelancers feel overwhelmed by inconsistent workloads, leaving little room for personal fulfillment.

The solution lies in redefining success on your terms and building a work structure that supports it. Erase the definition for success you’ve accepted and write your own. 

A Simple Framework: The LIFE Alignment Process

Here’s a four-step process to align your work with your life. It’s practical, adaptable, and rooted in mindset shifts that empower you to take control.

Step 1: Define Your Life’s Core Pillars 

Start by identifying what matters most in your life. These are your “core pillars”—the non-negotiables that define your ideal life. For me, it’s family, creativity, and personal growth. For you, it might be health, adventure, or community.

Take 10 minutes to write down 3-5 pillars. Be specific: “spending uninterrupted evenings with my kids” or “having time to train for a marathon.” These pillars are your North Star. Without them, you’re building a career on someone else’s terms.

Mindset tip: Let go of guilt. Society often tells us to prioritize work over life, but your pillars are your permission to put life first. If you’ve ever finished a year with unused vacation days or worked during your vacation, I’m looking at you.

Step 2: Audit Your Current Work

Now, hold your current work up to the mirror of your pillars. Does it support them or drain them? Be honest. If you’re an employee, are you spending hours on low-impact tasks that steal time from your family? If you’re a solopreneur, are you taking on clients who don’t respect your boundaries?

Create a simple two-column chart: “Supports My Pillars” and “Drains My Pillars.” List your tasks, projects, or clients in each. For example, an employee might put “leading the new marketing campaign” in the “Supports” column if it aligns with their creativity pillar, but “endless status meetings” in the “Drains” column. A solopreneur might list a high-value client in “Supports” but a low-paying, demanding gig in “Drains.”

Mindset tip: Embrace clarity over comfort. This audit might reveal tough truths, but it’s the first step to reclaiming your time and energy. You’re not stuck—you’re gathering data to make better choices.

Step 3: Strategize Selective Commitment

With your audit in hand, it’s time to commit selectively. For employees, this means negotiating for what you want and setting strict boundaries. Practice polite refusals: “I’d love to contribute, but my bandwidth is focused on (priority project).” For solopreneurs, prioritize clients who respect your vision and boundaries, and phase out those who don’t.

Try this: Identify one action to amplify a “Supports” item (e.g., pitching a flexible work arrangement) and one to minimize a “Drains” item (e.g., delegating a low-value task). Start small—small wins build momentum.

Mindset tip: Selective commitment isn’t selfish; it’s strategic. By focusing on what aligns with your pillars, you deliver more value in less time. Research from Harvard Business Review (2024) shows that employees who prioritize high-impact work are 30% more likely to report job satisfaction. Solopreneurs who focus on aligned clients report 25% higher retention rates (Upwork, 2023).

Step 4: Experiment and Refine

Alignment isn’t a one-and-done fix; it’s a cycle. Test your changes for two weeks. Maybe you negotiate a four-day workweek or drop a draining client. Track how these shifts affect your pillars. Are you spending more time on what matters? Feeling less burned out?

Use a simple journal to reflect: “What worked? What didn’t? What’s next?” If something feels off, tweak it. Employees might need to renegotiate boundaries; solopreneurs might need to raise rates for misaligned work.

Mindset tip: Embrace experimentation. You’re not failing—you’re iterating toward a life that feels right. My downsizing experiment took months to refine, but each tweak brought me closer to freedom.

My Final Word: Your Life, Your Terms

Aligning your work to your life isn’t about perfection; it’s about progress. Start with one pillar, one audit, one “no.” Over time, these choices compound into a career that fuels your life, not drains it.

Want to dive deeper? Check out my YouTube video on balancing work and passion projects for more practical tips. And let me know—what’s one pillar you’re prioritizing this week? Just hit reply; I’d love to hear your story.

Join CONNECT-collective on YouTube and LinkedIn!

I would love to have you as part of the CONNECT-collective community on our other platforms. If you are a solopreneur or entertaining starting your own solo business, I invite you to check out CONNECT-collective on YouTube!\ and LinkedIn! I talk about starting solo businesses to escape your 9-5 while avoiding burnout. I would love to see you there!

Sending you all Peace, Love, & Harmony!

-Michele

Do You Need Help Tapping Into Your Potential?

Are you struggling to meet your goals and wish you had support? Have you ever considered working with a coach? You may not know what a coach does.

One-on-One Coaching:

• You and I develop an individualized plan targeting your specific goals

• You receive individualized support from me

• Answers to your specific questions

• Guidance on your specific issues and blocks

• Accessibility to me outside coaching sessions for added support (individual texts and emails to check in)

• Your plan leads to learning how your personal growth is in your control

Are you ready to take action but are at a loss on what step to take next? 

I can teach you how to get started and accelerate your growth by using repeatable methods. Need the tools? I’ve got them. The goal is always to make you independent. I should be working myself out of a job. Once you take off, you may want to have a session from time to time, especially if you are scaling your goals. A good coach teaches you how to stand on your own two feet. Contact me today. Are you ready to CONNECT?