Most people have a negative connotation associated with discipline.

They see discipline as:

• Punishment

• Punitive

• Limiting

Now, let me give you my perspective on discipline.

I see discipline as:

• Freeing

• Supportive

• Efficient & Effective

The Adult Definition of Discipline

Let’s create an adult definition of discipline.

We’ll frame our definition of discipline around something that is an area of study or training. 

I don’t think of it in terms of being the “best” version of yourself, because who knows what that is? Your best self can show up in limitless scenarios. You get the choice of which scenario you want to bring to life. It’s your own personal multiverse.

Discipline is a way to reinforce routines, systems, processes (whatever you want to call them) to make your life easier and more efficient.

First Things First

First, you have to decide what needs fixing.

Here are the areas where I need discipline:

• When and what I eat. (because I will eat french fries with every meal)

• When and how I exercise. (because I just don’t want to do it)

• When and how I work. (because I will never stop doing it)

I can’t leave these things to chance and expect I’ll accomplish them every day.

I recently shared my morning routine with a friend, emphasizing that I eat the same thing for breakfast every day at roughly the same time. “That’s boring,” she replied.

Here’s the thing. There are some things in my life that need to be exciting and interesting. My first meal of the day is not one of them. I need that meal to nourish me and give my body what it needs to operate at a high capacity.

I’ve learned it’s okay to be boring. In fact, I kinda like it. As a society we have become addicted to quick hits of pleasure. We expect life to be an amusement park from sunup to sundown. 

When drama and excitement are absent from our own lives we’ll participate in someone else’s by snacking on television “reality” shows or gorging on social media posts.

We use mindless language like, 

• “TV is my escape.”

• “Watching movies is my escape.”

• “Going on vacations is my escape.”

From what are we escaping? Life? 

Wouldn’t it be much wiser (and mindful) to use that time to build a life you don’t want to escape?

Getting the Most Out of Your Life

Discipline is a powerhouse skill you can learn. 

Discipline asks, “I want XYZ out of life. Will this thing help me get there?”

Here’s how you develop discipline:

• You know the first step, everyone. Self-awareness. It’s always the first step. How can you improve anything if you aren’t aware of what needs improvement? 

• Explore: Are there areas of your life where you are already disciplined? Reflect on those. Why are you disciplined in these areas? What do you get from that discipline? Was there a time you weren’t disciplined in those areas and you had to grow into it? With which things did it seem easy to adopt disciplined habits?

• Make a written list of things you need to do consistently to get what you want out of life, but you haven’t yet developed the discipline to do them.

• Write a plan you can implement today or tomorrow. Keep it simple. Do it daily.

But I Still Don’t Want to Do It

We always have a choice. We can do, or we can not do.

What is your leverage, the reason for wanting to change your life? Understand that the internal fight with discipline you have is of your own creation. What are the implications of not being disciplined? 

Let’s play a mental movie.

Scene 1: Visualize your current situation as clearly as you can. What do you like about your current life? Who’s in it? What do you look like in this current movie? Make this movie as enjoyable as you want.

Scene 2: Now, visualize all the things you would get out of achieving that thing you say you want. What does future you look like? What does your future life look like? Who’s in it? How has it improved?

Scene 3: Current you and future you are sitting at a table in a room with nothing else in it. 

Future you asks, “Why do you want to change your current life?”

Current you responds with a full explanation. Take a moment to give your full explanation now.

Future you presses, “Then, why aren’t you doing it?”

Current you starts removing small items from her pocket and placing them on the table. These items represent the changes you have to make to become future you.

Current you and future you lock eyes knowing you are at a standoff.

Is it the discomfort of effort that is keeping you from doing something that could change your life in a powerful way? 

Are you okay with that?

Be mindful of your words. When you catch yourself saying, “I can’t,” “I’m too tired,” “It’s too hard,” and so on, change your words to, “I choose not to . . .”.

It’s your choice.

Take Action

Are you ready to take action but are at a loss on what to do first? I can teach you how to get started and accelerate your growth by using repeatable methods. Need the tools? I’ve got them. The goal is always to make you independent. I should be working myself out of a job. Once you take off, you may want to have a session from time to time, especially if you are scaling your goals. A good coach teaches you how to stand on your own two feet. Contact me today. Are you ready to CONNECT?