Healthy Obsessions

Obsessive Effects

When was the last time you became obsessed with something (in a good way)?

You’ve recently taken up a hobby that you spend all your spare time doing. You love to learn about it, engage in it, and tell other people about it. And, truth be told, you even have t-shirts and tanks you sport to broadcast your obsession to the masses.

Professionally, you’ve obsessed over getting a promotion at work. You spend hours studying data, preparing for interviews, learning new skills, and incessantly talking to friends over end-of-week happy hours.

When you become obsessed with something it . . .

• Fills your mental space

• Fills your physical space

• Fills your emotional space

There is no room for anything else.

Have you noticed how your focus narrows like you’re zeroing in on a target when you’re obsessed? You decisively swap out useless habits for useful ones. You don’t hem and haw, you just strike. You naturally fall into a learn, apply, tweak cycle that pushes your progress to soar. You are in the zone.

This is easy when we are obsessive about something with low stakes - a hobby, planning a vacation, vying for a promotion. However, high stakes . . . well, a high stakes obsession tests your confidence, competence, and courage.

I’ve chatted with some of you who have low stakes obsessions, hobbies that you enjoy so much that you engage in them with every spare minute. Flying on a plane? It’s crafting time. Watching a movie? It’s crafting time. If you can’t physically do it, then you’ll read or watch something about it. But, contemplating turning that hobby into a business raises the stakes. You have the hobby thing down to a science But making it a business? That’s scary.

There are those of you who dream about radically changing your life - how you show up in the world. You have big obstacles to overcome, but you think, “Someday, I’m going to change my life.” You just can’t do it right now. You have your reasons.

Then, there are those of you who have shared outside the proverbial box goals - amazing visions. Visions of helping orphaned children in your local community or supporting low socioeconomic families with healthcare needs not met by other resources. 

You’ve identified gaps in the system, and you want to fix them. But, it feels too big. Out of reach. Unachievable.

Obsessive Drive

This isn’t the newsletter where I tell you to pursue the cause. No, this letter is much more basic. 

I have one question for you: Is your goal, dream, or vision worth obsessing over?

Only you can decide. And, if you defer to someone else (my mom doesn’t think I can do it; my friends think it’s a crazy idea), then you’ve decided. Even if that someone else says, “Yeah, absolutely, you should go for it!” you have decided that it’s not worthy. That’s why you need backup in the form of someone else’s opinion.

There is no backup to your goals, dreams, or vision. You are the backup. You have to believe it’s a worthwhile venture. Shift your energy. Exchange your doubting words, thoughts, and actions with those that say, “Yes, I can (and I want to) do this!”

[DISCLAIMER: Listen, if you’re just not feeling it, then don’t do it. We are all filled with ideas. I could never execute all the ideas I have coursing through my mind palace.

Maybe your obsession is enough to fill up time with a hobby that’s for fun, relaxation, and making presents. Maybe your obsession is enough to fill up time volunteering for a community organization (a very worthy cause). 

Maybe that obsession doesn’t create an insatiable drive in you to create a business or a major life shift or a movement. That’s fine. 

But, if you’re driven, then drive you must.]

Driven people are obsessed. They mean to make the change, do the thing, and reach that vision come hell or high water. But do they start there?

In short, no.

Remember, the higher the stakes the more tests you will encounter. You will lose faith. You will doubt yourself. Don’t use faith or confidence as your gauge. You’re only human, my friend. 

Those feelings of doubt will never go away. You will always question yourself (which can be a healthy habit). But, the doubt will dissipate.

How? How do you get yourself so obsessively focused (again, in a good way) that you will maintain the drive you need to accomplish your goals, dreams, and vision?

• Put blinders on to focus your vision.

• Create your own bubble. A bubble of you. 

• Guard your mind - your thoughts, your words, your actions.

Imagine you have a glass sitting in front of you. It’s empty. You’re thirsty. With what will you fill it? Water quenches your thirst and is good for your body . . . but it’s boring. You could drink tea, enjoy a soda, or have a cocktail. Different libations with different effects.

The glass represents your goals, your dreams, your vision. With what will you fill it?

The thoughts, words, and actions of other people? Or your thoughts, words, actions - carefully crafted and curated?

Do your thoughts, words, and actions align to the life you want - the one you dream about? Or do your thoughts, words, and actions cycle through on autopilot, giving you more of the same?

Our last newsletter discussed the 1% rule - making incremental changes and improvements. Each time you learn, apply, and tweak you add more of your thoughts, words, and actions to your glass. 

Obsess over your thoughts, words, and actions.

The goal is to fill the metaphorical glass up so full of your vision that the glass doesn’t have room for anything else. You don’t have space for naysayers. You don’t have space for doubt. You are full and overflowing with your vision.

All you have to do is decide if your vision is worthy of your obsession.

Is it?

Do You Need Help Tapping Into Your Potential?

Are you struggling to meet your goals and wish you had support? Have you ever considered working with a coach? You may not know what a coach does.

One-on-One Coaching:

• You and I develop an individualized plan targeting your specific goals

• You receive individualized support from me

• Answers to your specific questions

• Guidance on your specific issues and blocks

• Accessibility to me outside coaching sessions for added support (individual texts and emails to check in)

• Your plan leads to learning how your personal growth is in your control

Are you ready to take action but are at a loss on what step to take next? 

I can teach you how to get started and accelerate your growth by using repeatable methods. Need the tools? I’ve got them. The goal is always to make you independent. I should be working myself out of a job. Once you take off, you may want to have a session from time to time, especially if you are scaling your goals. A good coach teaches you how to stand on your own two feet. Contact me today. Are you ready to CONNECT?