Sunrise to Sunset: Do THIS to Supercharge Your Days

“Bookending” Your Days

Take a second to reflect on the past five days. I have two questions for you:

1. How did you start your days?

2. How did you end your days?

My beginnings and endings were always . . . busy, just like the middles. From the time I woke up until my head hit the pillow at night, I was busy. I went nonstop, walking at a fast clip to move from one thing to the next. Multitasking to maximize my productivity. And I was exhausted all the time.

I had a lot going on, but I wasn’t making progress. Does that make sense? Things were happening, but I was regressing.

I never had time to just sit still and rest. I thought I would rest when I went to bed, but my sleep sucked. My mind and body were on alert 24/7. I had decision fatigue (mental fatigue) on top of my physical fatigue.

That was before I realized that my priorities were in the reverse order they needed to be, and it was wreaking havoc on my life. Once I started putting me first, everything got sorted out over time.

We put a lot of focus and energy on the middle parts of our days, when we are at work and interacting with people. But, we totally neglect the most important parts - the beginnings and the endings that bookend your days.

This is the time you have for yourself. You have more control over how you spend those hours. And, they both have important jobs to carry out, if we let them.

Start of Day: The First Bookend

The beginning of your day sets the tone. If you bolt out of bed because you overslept, have only 15 minutes to get ready, and pray for every green light on your way to work, it’s a hectic start to the day.

There were a couple of decades (okay, almost three) of my life where my mornings were insane. I was dealing with health issues, so waking up and staying awake were a challenge. I didn’t know it at the time, but I had major adrenal fatigue. I was a teacher or principal for a chunk of that time, so I had to be at school (a half hour away) between 7:00 and 7:30 in the morning. Mornings were not fun.

Fortunately, I developed a solid morning routine during quarantine that helped me maintain my sanity before I left my last in-person job. I woke up a little earlier so I had enough time to meditate, get in a few minutes of yoga, and enjoy a cup of coffee while I journaled. 

I cherished my morning routine, and I refused to let those precious minutes go. That morning routine is what roused me to the fact that my burnout had reached a crisis level with no end in sight. 

End of Day: The Second Bookend

The end of your day is just as important as the beginning. It is for processing, reflecting, and preparing. 

Activities that support processing and reflection are journaling, walking, breathwork, and meditation. You hear about these activities over and over and over. I’m like a broken record, right? These are free superpowers. They are the most simple, effective practices to implement, and you can squeeze them into any schedule.

Prepare at night for your mornings. Have your coffee ready to perk. Pick out what you’re going to wear. And, prepare for sleep. If we don’t sleep well it trainwrecks the next morning (which invariably permeates throughout the rest of the day). 

I know I preach about turning your phone off all the time, but I am an evangelist for no evening screen time at least an hour before bed. I will testify to the change it made in my life. I sleep so much better since I’ve been shutting down my phone in the evening. My mind doesn’t race as I try to drift into sleep. Once I shut off the lights I’m asleep within five minutes. Life changing, y’all. Life changing.

Long Term Impacts of Busyness

You may be thinking, “Yeah, it would be real nice to ease into my mornings and float on a cloud to bed each night!”

These bookends don’t need to take hours. They don’t need to take one hour. Just a few minutes a day is all.

If you can manage fifteen minutes in the morning, I promise it will be worth it.

Morning routines have three main ingredients: solitude, movement, and nourishment (though I won’t be discussing food today). When you first wake up, don’t be tempted to hop on social media or turn on the news. That’s like turning on bright lights to wake someone up. Rude.

Your brain moves from deep sleep, when delta waves are in control, to light sleep/deep relaxation, when theta waves send signals to your body to begin the waking process. Theta waves are super chill. They tag team with alpha waves to wake you up while keeping you in a relaxed state. Your body slowly moves from the alpha to beta. Beta and gamma waves are active when you’re fully engaged. 

When you rush your brain with stimuli from phones, televisions, and bright lights first thing in the morning you are forcing your body to jump from theta (relaxed, dream-like state) to beta (alert and focused) and gamma (problem-solving mode), which are energy and focus hogs. 

This is the equivalent of yanking yourself out of bed, shaking your shoulders roughly, and smacking yourself in the face several times to start the day.

When you force your body to constantly jump from theta to beta and gamma you train your brain to be on alert 24/7. You train your body to not rest by cheating it out of deep and restful sleep (delta to theta). You trade relaxation time in for constant action.

You become accustomed to rushing - jumping out of bed, running around like your hair's on fire trying to fit everything in before you rush out the door to work. Then, you run around like your hair's on fire at work trying to fit everything in before you leave. You end your day by running around, hair on fire style, stuffing in everything else until you collapse on your sofa and “relax” by watching television and scrolling on your phone.

And, you wonder why you’re exhausted all the time.

Your Self-Care Bookends

Morning routine examples:

• 15 Minutes: Coffee and journaling w/ a 3 minute stretch OR 10 minutes of yoga with 5 minutes of meditation

• 30 Minutes: 5 minutes of meditation; 10 minutes of yoga/stretching; 15 minutes journaling and drinking coffee/tea

• 45 Minutes: 5 minutes of breathwork; 5 minutes of meditation; 20 minutes of yoga; 15 minutes journaling and drinking coffee/tea

Evening routine example:

• Shut down phone (minimum an hour before bed); prep morning coffee/tea (3 minutes); lay out clothes; take a bath or shower (5-20 minutes); drink hot tea that promotes sleep while reading a book (15-30 minutes)

The most important reason for bookending your days is setting a habit of self-care. Self-care is usually the first thing to go when our schedules become overloaded. We sacrifice self-care to take care of things outside us. It’s called self-care for a reason - because you are the only one who can do it.

This brings up another point: If you find that work, activities after work, and other life things are impeding on your time, don’t get angry. Instead, be thankful for the hint life is giving you. Life is saying, “Hey, you don’t like all this busy, busy, busy crap. Make some adjustments.”

You set the boundaries; you draw the lines. Problems arise when you don’t make your boundaries known. 

“I have to work later. I have to finish all my work. They’ll fire me if I don’t.”

“I have to finish all my errands tonight.” 

“The kids have to play three different sports each.”

Trust me when I tell you that the physical and mental stress you load onto yourself like you are a pack mule can have devastating results.

Life is smart. It sends out pings, or signals, every day to see if we are paying attention. The more in tune with yourself you are, the louder the signal. You receive it, and you make changes. However, the average person is so busy that they bat the pings away because they are interfering with their work or errands.

Ignoring these signals will lead to burnout. This is certain. 

We’ll wrap up this newsletter by looking at how you can bring more of what you want into your life.

More of This and Less of That

I call this activity your More of This v. Less of That bucket lists. The graphic above is a representation, but you can make your own lists.

Do this when you have 15 minutes of uninterrupted time. Take a few minutes (less than 5) to think of 3 activities that you have done in the past that have helped you feel relaxed and at peace. It can be anything, so don’t limit yourself, but be specific.

Now take a few minutes (again, less than 5) to think of 3 things that constantly infringe upon your time or stress you out.

Ask yourself, “How can I limit one of the things that stresses me out and monopolizes my time, so I can make room for one of the things that I enjoy?” We’re doing only a one for one trade here, so don’t get too ambitious.

For example, maybe you said that you enjoyed a spa day with friends a few months back. How can you replicate aspects of that at home and create a spa-like environment? Get in a habit of leaving work on time every Friday to treat yourself to an evening spa day.

Once you’ve nailed that one down, move on to the next.

If you enjoy being outdoors, leave work on time on Mondays to go take a walk in the park.

Little by little, reclaim your time and set your boundaries. Don’t approach it in a manner that makes you feel overwhelmed and obligated. Big changes come through small, consistent actions.

These ideas may seem simple and maybe even silly, but you miss the point if you feel that way. The point is you crave change, but you remain on the hamster wheel of ‘busy” because you are addicted to it. And, I do mean addicted. There is a rush, a high that comes with busyness. It’s called “process addiction.” As with all addictions, it is destructive.

Don’t expect others to make you a priority when not even you do that.

See the wisdom in placing yourself first, and try the More of This v. Less of That activity. Don’t be surprised to find you will fight it. It will feel foreign and uncomfortable. Unraveling busyness takes time, attention, and patience. But, if you stick with it you can live life on your terms.

As always, my friends, I’m sending you Peace, Love, & Harmony!

Do You Need Help Tapping Into Your Potential?

Are you struggling to meet your goals and wish you had support? Have you ever considered working with a coach? You may not know what a coach does.

One-on-One Coaching:

• You and I develop an individualized plan targeting your specific goals

• You receive individualized support from me

• Answers to your specific questions

• Guidance on your specific issues and blocks

• Accessibility to me outside coaching sessions for added support (individual texts and emails to check in)

• Your plan leads to learning how your personal growth is in your control

Are you ready to take action but are at a loss on what step to take next? 

I can teach you how to get started and accelerate your growth by using repeatable methods. Need the tools? I’ve got them. The goal is always to make you independent. I should be working myself out of a job. Once you take off, you may want to have a session from time to time, especially if you are scaling your goals. A good coach teaches you how to stand on your own two feet. Contact me today. Are you ready to CONNECT?